Medicine Program Redesign Proposes Replacing Students With Well-Trained Ferrets

Written by Ara Downey and edited by Victoria Sun In an unexpected departure from traditional teaching styles, the new Medicine Green Paper proposes replacing students with “well-trained ferrets”: “The shift from human students to ferrets is expected to increase the financial and logistical efficiency of our program without sacrificing the

Emoji Overuse: The newest epidemic plaguing medical students

By Geraldine Yang; Edited by Allyson Tai The NSW Health Department has issued a Public Service Announcement alert regarding the rapid spread of the neurodegenerative disease, Emoji Overuse Syndrome. There are currently 725 confirmed cases nation-wide. Initially discovered amongst UNSW Medicine students on Facebook, the disease has since spread to

Snake Oil Salesmen: From Omega-3 to Quack Remedies

By Mansimran Loyal; Edited by Katerina Theocharous The phrase ‘snake oil salesmen’ conjures images of sleazy businessmen, peddling worthless, overpriced products to unsuspecting customers. Today, it is commonly used to describe self-proclaimed health and lifestyle experts pushing “cure-all” elixirs and quick fixes, found everywhere from Instagram and shopping centres to

Water Clock

 By Sandra Goria “Dreams and Disillusionment in Medicine” Writing Competition Winner “Beauty is truth, truth beauty,—that is all Ye know on earth, and all ye need to know.” – John Keats, Ode to a Grecian Urn  Two days before the start of my first day of Medical School.  We sat on the

Blameless

By Jonathan Cheng “Dreams and Disillusionment in Medicine” Writing CompetitionRunner-up Present In an almost autonomic fashion, Stefanos stared down the bottom of his glass pensively before draining its contents. He delicately lay down the glass next to empty bottles of Penfold Grange of various years in the 1950s. The whiteness

Heart to Heart Takes On: Studying!

In honour of the very much current exam season (sigh), the Jugular family wishes to spare you the accompanying package deal of disheartening, self-doubting, staring-at-the-ceiling-in-a-self-hating-daze phase by focusing on *surprise surprise* studying! Thank you to everyone for submitting your wonderful questions, and hopefully, this serves as a gentle reminder that patience and kindness to oneself are just as important as to others. <3

UNSW MEDICINE AND HEALTH ANNOUNCES PHASING STUDENTS OUT IN FAVOUR OF AI LANGUAGE MODELS

by Ara Downey, aided by ChatGPT The author wishes to redact with apologies her previous article entitled ‘Medicine Program Redesign Proposes Replacing Students With Well-Trained Ferrets’. In the light of recent technological developments and concerns about the ferrets’ ability to comply with infection control procedures, the Faculty of Medicine and